Tuesday, May 8, 2012


This mom business is nothing new to me.  I'm on my third...and a half (I like to throw Chunky Monkey in the mix).  I've got the routines down, improved on my disciplining techniques, understand the workings of a baby, and stress way less than I did when I had one.  I would consider myself a somewhat seasoned mom.

Being a seasoned mom you would think I would not break the cardinal rule of newborn mommyhood, but I have. In fact, I've broken the rule at least a dozen times per child.  If you do the math you'll realized I've broken the rule 12.5 x 3...carry the one...yep, about 37.5 times.  Breaking the rule that often leaves you breathless.  Literally.  Breathless.

Are you curious about the cardinal rule?  I bet you too have broken it.  Maybe not as many times as I have, but I bet you've done it.  Here's the cardinal rule of newborn mommyhood...

Thou shalt not ever touch the chez in your baby's fat rolls and then smell it.

Come on.  You know you've done it.  You lift up their neck rolls and see that little white stuff just hanging out.  The soap you didn't rinse out well enough.  The roll you didn't dry completely.  The spot where the milk collects. Yes, the areas where the chez collects.   Well, you wipe it off and then check to see if it smells.  Have we not learned from past experiences?  IT WILL ALWAYS SMELL.

It's like that saying, "Don't do the same thing over and over and expect different results."  So from this day on, I promise to not touch the funk and then smell it.  I promise to get a wash cloth and wipe it away, resisting the urge to 'check' if it's stinky.  I will remember that it is always stinky.  Now, could someone please remind me of this tomorrow?  It's bath day.  Inevitably, I will find some chez under one of Littlest Man's many rolls.  Help me, Wanda.  Help me!

No comments: